The Art of the Kamasutra is an ancient text that instructs in love and sex and is known the world round for its acrobatic and flexible positions. While trying new things is always fun, there are some positions that should be approached with caution or completely avoided because of the damage they could cause to the penis. Here are five positions men should seriously consider before trying.
Kamasutra No-No Position #1: The Cowgirl and Lean Back
Okay, so the man is laying on his back with the woman astride in typical cowgirl fashion. Feels good, right? Okay, but then comes the lean back, which deepens penetration and may lead to a little G-spot stimulation for her. The lean then increases.
So, as that lean goes all the way, the penis is forced to hyperextend from the pressure and weight on the shaft of the penis. Over time, it creates scar tissue, which creates a plaque buildup that can lead to Peyronie’s disease, or a significant and potentially painful bend in the penis.
Kamasutra No-No Position #2: The Kitchen Quickie
In this position, the woman is sitting on a counter and the man is standing on his tiptoes. Thrust and repeat. Seems like a fun, spontaneous way to play naughty housewife, right?
This position is really risky and can lead to a penis fracture. Because it is such a highly erotic position, thrusting can get a little imprecise and the penis can slam into the counter or the woman’s pubic bone if he goes too high or too low. Also, if the man is on tiptoes and gets a leg cramp, he could slam the penis at an unforgiving angle.
Kamasutra No-No Position #3: Pogo Stick
Okay, this is another standing position that most people would think of as standing missionary. The man holds the total weight of the woman, who will sometimes wrap her legs around his waist. The man then flexes his knees while literally bouncing the woman on his dick.
This position has a lot of injury potential. Back pain, strain, knee buckling, knee injury, and if he bounces wrong, the penis can poke into another area that denies entry, causing a bruise or fracture. Proceed cautiously.
Kamasutra No-No Position #4: Standing Wheelbarrow
Noticing a theme here? This position looks like what it sounds like. The man stands and enters the woman like he would for doggy style, but then lifts her up by her pelvis. She then wraps her legs around the man’s waist and puts her hands on the ground. It’s like summer camp, but sexier.
There are several possibilities for injury here. She keeps moving and he stops, and upon re-entry the penis bends uncomfortably. His arms give out and he drops her with his penis still in. Back strain from leaning back slightly and tripping over shoes while wheelbarrowing through the house is another potential consequence.
Kamasutra No-No Position #5: Exercise Ball Blitz
So, the first question must be, why an exercise ball? For the bounce, of course! However, think about it. Remember bounce houses – did everyone who was bouncing stay up? Did they go in the directions they intended?
In this position, the man sits on the ball with the woman astride, facing him. Then bounce. It seems fun, right? Well, if the bounce is too high, the penis can slip out and every time the penis comes all the way out in a sexual position, there is an increased chance of a penis break. It can also really hurt the woman involved. Double ouch!
No matter which Kamasutra positions a man chooses, he should always rejuvenate his member with a little tenderness. After cleansing, massage the penis with a specially formulated penis health creme (health professionals recommend Man 1 Man Oil, which has been clinically proven safe and mild for skin). Chock full of penis-specific vitamins and amino acids, the crème will rejuvenate and protect the penis, while hydrating and sealing in moisture so the guy downstairs is ready to plow through the Kamasutra.