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Avoid a Sore Penis when Going for the Gold – Safety Precautions during the Sex Olympics

The Winter Olympics are going on for a limited time in Sochi, Russia, but the Sex Olympics can go on forever (or until a sore penis says “enough!”) Best of all, absolutely anyone can participate in the Sex Olympics: there are no qualifying rounds and no entry requirements. All that is needed is a desire to go for a personal gold. A partner is required for some activities, but guys who are not part of a team can find plenty of solo pleasure, as well. One word of caution: as in all sports, taking proper care is necessary, so participants should ensure that their penis health does not become compromised amid all the fun.

Solo Events

Solo sexual activity has a long and varied history as a prominent part of the Sexual Olympics. Indeed, for many teen participants, the solo categories are their only chance to shine – and shine they do (but don’t count out the older participants; after all, experience does count for something!). Some of the more popular solo Olympic events include:

  • Handball. Points are given for style and technique as contestants massage their testicles in the most imaginative and exciting manner possible. Extra points are given to men who manage to achieve an orgasm solely through stroking of the testicles and without concentrating on the penis- a sure way to get the gold.
  • Shooting. An age-old favorite of all men, the shooting competition encourages participates to create the most forceful ejaculations possible. Bronze medals are given to those whose ejaculate reaches the chest; silver to those whose ejaculate strikes the chin; and gold to those who reach the forehead or above.

Team Events

Team events are popular favorites the world over. Some of the most beloved include:

  • Pole vault. For this event, a man lies on his back and places his erection at a 90-degree angle to his prone body. The partner takes a running jump, grabs the erect pole and leaps; unlike in regular Olympics event, however, the goal is not for the partner to let go of the pole and fly overhead but to lower oneself onto the pole – and to keep raising and lowering oneself.
  • Ski jump.  A woman lies prone on a bed or another flat, comfortable surface with her legs sufficiently spread. A man stands at the edge of the bed. At the appropriate signal, he slides on his stomach across the bed; rather than seeking to jump and clear the feminine obstacle in his path, however, he attempts to slide gently in.
  • Trampoline. A male lies on his back on a bouncy surface, such as a springy bed; an erection is required. His partner lowers her- or himself on the erection and bounces vigorously up and down. Can also be accomplished with a female on the bottom and the male inserting the penis before begin his bouncing.
  • Triathlon. Any of the above-reference activities, but utilizing three teammates rather than two. (Care must be taken to ensure that no one team member, or the member of any one team member, is given short shrift – no matter how short it may in fact be.)
  • Pentathlon. A triathlon with five people. Requires significant stamina, so not recommended for the timid.
  • Freestyle wrestling. In ordinary wrestling, the goal is to avoid being pinned. When entering sex-based Olympics, one strives to get pinned as quickly as possible. Also as often.

Amping up performance with extra penis care

Sex Olympics are a great way to spice up one’s sex life, but improper play can definitely lead to a very sore penis. Sexual athletes who are “in the know” make it a point to regularly use a gold medal-quality penis nutrient cream (health professionals recommend Man 1 Man Oil). An Olympics-worthy cream will include vitamin A, as that vitamin’s anti-bacterial qualities help to fight the penis odor that accompanies strenuous activity. In addition, a cream with acetyl L carnitine will move a guy further into the winner’s circle by maintaining optimum penis sensation.

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